Burgers, Veggie Lasagna, and A Change of Appetite…

Last week I found a one pound package of grass fed beef on sale.  It was frozen, so I popped it in my deep freezer to save it for whatever idea might come up.  Since I was off work Monday for Memorial Day, I thought I’d fulfill my duty as an American and cook burgers.  I’ve been trying to use grass fed beef for recipes for several years now – not always successfully, but more often than not.

However…

In the past, to make the burgers extra yummy and flavorful, I’d pull out a packet of that staple of the Deep South cook – good old Lipton Onion Soup Mix.  One packet, a quarter cup of water, and 2 pounds of ground beef, and you’ve got yourself a tasty burger.



“Five Classic Recipes…Right on the Box” !

And then, inside the box: Onions, salt, corn starch, sugar, corn syrup solids, caramel color, hydrolyzed soy protein, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, yeast extract, monosodium glutamate, natural flavors, disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate.

Lots of winners there, including partially hydrogenated oil and MSG.

My mission was to concoct a “real food” equivalent to the soup mix.  I studied recipes and found that most of the “make your own mix” recipes included beef bouillon granules – try finding healthy “granules” of anything. I did find one recipe that was merely a mixture of spices, all of which I already owned except for one, so I bought some celery seed and went that route.  I used this version: Homemade Onion Soup Mix.  It looked really nice in the bowl – seeing exactly what I was going to be putting into our food made me feel good about what I’m doing.

Starting at 12 o’clock and working counterclockwise:

• parsley
• onion powder
• celery seed
• pepper
• garlic powder
• all surrounding the onion flakes

Isn’t that kind of pretty?  I thought so.  This recipe makes enough mix for 2 lbs. of beef.  Since I was only using 1 lb. I measured out half the spices – roughly 2 tablespoons.  I put the other 2 T. into a snack sized ziplock and will pull it out the next time we want burgers.

I quickly defrosted the beef (not in the microwave, but by putting the unopened package in a ziplock and running cold water over it and letting it sit in a bowl in the sink…change the water every 30 minutes and soon the meat will defrost evenly) and put it in a bowl.  I added my homemade spice mixture, one tablespoon of bread crumbs, and to add a little moisture, I put in about 1/3 c. beef stock.  I found this organic one on sale for $2.99 at Publix and will use the rest to cook some quinoa this week.  (Emeril’s brand.  I know.  I had to resist yelling “Bam!” every time I poured in stock.)


Oh, and I used a Sharpie to give myself a deadline for using the stock.   I need all the help I can get remembering things.

I mixed everything gently with a fork, just till it all came together, then cooked the burgers on my griddle pan.  I’ve been shying away from using my George Foreman grill lately – with all of the liquids/fats draining away, the meat sometimes ended up really dry.

The occasional pan-fried burger made from high quality beef isn’t going to hurt us, I figure.  I cooked them carefully, tilted the pan toward the end of cooking to let excess liquids drain, and those burgers turned out tender, juicy, and really flavorful.  We didn’t miss the Lipton soup mix, that’s for sure.  I’m sure these burgers would turn out great on the grill, if you enjoy cooking out.

Another dish that got a bit of a makeover recently – lasagna.  I’ve always done a pretty traditional meat/cheese/sauce/pasta combination.  I wanted to experiment with a meatless version.  I searched and looked at a lot of veggie lasagna recipes, and finally settled on this one: Vegetarian Lasagna.  If you click, you’ll see it has a “surprise” ingredient.  If you’re not a tofu fan (now stop…I’m not becoming a total hippie granola bar) then….keep reading.  The only time I’ve ever eaten tofu was in sweet and sour soup – thin little strips, no big deal.  The thought of a big block of the stuff in my lasagna, though?  I was less than enthused.  But I persevered.  I love roasted red peppers, so that ingredient won me over, and of course, those add a lot of flavor to this dish – and the tofu is crumbled and kneaded into the ricotta cheese mixture.  It gives it some thickness and some richness, and you’d never even know it was there.  I made up the whole amount but split it into two pans, one of which I popped into the freezer for a busy weeknight meal.  The lasagna was dense but not dry, and full of flavor.  Both Kerry and David enjoyed it and didn’t miss the meat at all.  Definitely worth a try if you like Italian food.

So, over the last couple of weeks, I have successfully added more vegetables to our meals, while simultaneously reducing the amount of red meat we’ve been eating.  We’re eating more fish as well.  I have found that, for the most part, meat doesn’t even sound that good to me.  Today we celebrated my dad’s 82nd birthday at Cracker Barrel, and I scoured the menu for whatever sounded good.  With my new way of eating, I planned to have a real “special occasion” meal if I wanted to – fried chicken or chicken ‘n dumplings or whatever I wanted…but I didn’t want any of those things.  I finally settled on a vegetable plate and took my time with the fresh corn, the okra, and the pinto beans.  The others at the table were eating dessert and I was still finishing my food.  I was so full I couldn’t even touch my cornbread or hashbrown casserole.  I find myself craving cool, light foods these days, more often than not.  Lunch has become a lighter meal – maybe a few good crackers, some creamy havarti or brie, and some fruit.  I recently bought some artichoke hearts, for pete’s sake.  What’s more, I even ATE AND ENJOYED THEM instead of leaving them in the pantry for years.  Who am I?!??!!!

Finally, while losing weight was not and is not my primary objective here, I couldn’t help noticing the difference in my face when I look in the mirror, and the loose-fitting clothing that used to be tight.  So, I stepped on the scale a few days ago.  From my highest point since pregnancy, I have lost twelve and a half pounds so far.

Not bad.  And I am eating the most delicious foods I’ve had in my life!  This is absolutely a joy and an adventure, and I’m so grateful to have such wonderful foods to choose from…  So, stay tuned, and enjoy your food!

Next time, I’ll be posting about my inaugural trip to our new Earth Fare store, as well as a really simple but delicious and elegant dessert I made recently.  A true Southern classic!

Blogger Tags: hamburgers, onion soup mix, vegetarian, lasagna, weight loss, living a full life

Tested

I’ve done a considerable amount of thinking over the last few days.  As much enjoyment and excitement as I feel about my quest to eat real foods…I don’t think I’ll change the name of this blog.

On that long-ago October night, when I was sleep deprived and up (again) with a 7 year old Stephen, when I thought maybe I’d start a blog, the Pink Floyd song that lends its name to this site drifted into my head with its perfect, delicate mix of despair and hope. I’ve always hoped to use these pages to share my honest and oftentimes gut wrenching feelings…to share my inside thoughts with an outside world.

In today’s cultural climate we’re inundated with images, sounds, advertisements, subliminal messages.  We communicate via computer or text message.  We are, as MIT professor Sherry Turkle's book states, Alone Together.  I’m almost as guilty as my teenage son of using these media to “connect” with other human beings.  A case in point: one of Kerry’s friends “texted” him to invite him to a movie.  Kerry is notoriously bad at checking his phone, so he missed out on the fun.  When I said, “I wonder why he didn’t just call our home number?” Kerry told me later that his friend “didn’t even think of that.”  We are alone, together!  The very words streaming from my fingers are destined to be published on the web…a desperate, even pitiable attempt to throw a lifeline out, to see if anyone is out there in a world that seems farther and farther away from my isolated little family unit.  This blog has always been about crying out, about seeking validation, even approval.  Every time I click “publish,” I wait anxiously to see if anyone notices, or better yet, comments.  For a minute or two, I feel…important.  Valued.  I matter.  What I say matters.

I do not mean to imply that over the years of this blog, the thoughts torn loose from a heart sore and heavy with pain are somehow untrue, or embellished in any way…or God forbid a raw bid for pity.  No, like any card-carrying introvert, I simply find it much easier to express myself “on paper.”  But, would I find it nearly excruciating to sit across from any of my readers and express these thoughts?  Undoubtedly I would.  Would I fidget and stammer over my words?  Would I say the same things I say here?  Am I wearing the inside out?  Why is it so hard to look each other in the eye?  I can’t blame it all on my Myers-Briggs personality type. Why do we hide behind the very devices that purport to encourage a sense of community?

For years I’ve been a member of an online bulletin board dedicated to the band Rush.  At first it didn’t really occur to me that it might be important to avoid building an internet persona – a character that I could customize to be whomever I wanted her to be.  Isn’t the internet the perfect playground for branching out, being a little different, creating the person you wish you were?  It can be, and for many people, that’s almost all that it is.  But when I found myself carefully crafting sentences, trying to be extra clever, or meticulously searching for just the right picture of me or my kids (!) to really drive home what a supercool person I was…it hit me.  To borrow from Turkle again: I was experiencing what is called “presentation anxiety” over how best to demonstrate to the internet the image I was unconsciously creating.  It’s like a mask we wear…and as long as we never meet or connect in the outside world, the illusion stays intact, and we pretend to ourselves that we’re involved in each other’s lives.  Does this encourage true community? 

Luckily, early in my years of making “internet friends,” I was able to meet some of them in person – and I knew I wanted to be the same person online or in the flesh.  My point is that the temptation is there, to make yourself seem different in some way…because it’s safe when you pretend to interact but in reality hold others at arm’s length.  I hope the very dear friends to whom I’m referring would agree that we are truly friends in every sense of the word, and I’m grateful for that.  This isn’t just about long-distance friends you’re not likely to see very often, though.  Ever seen someone you know in the store and gone out of your way NOT to run into them?  Be honest…

I must come clean about a few things, while I’m being so transparent – these confessions are part of my self-induced therapy.  I can no longer moan and groan to myself in my journal about the extra weight…and then eat so many Double-Stuf Oreos I lose count.  I can’t complain about feeling friendless when I grab my phone to text someone (keeping that safe buffer zone in place) instead of calling and hearing their voice.  I can’t whine about being miserable at work when I know in my heart I haven’t given it my all each day.  I can’t look myself in the eye in the mirror, pitying myself as a poor dear who has SO much on her shoulders, and then do nothing to take care of myself in the way that I deserve.

I’ve come to the conclusion that being honest on the internet is a true test of one’s integrity and sense of self, regardless of whether you ever come face to face with your target audience, be it friends at a Rush concert, or the neighbor down the street that you’ve “friended” on Facebook but never walk down the street to, you know…talk to…

As I continue to strive toward a better life, I want to commit to myself that I will also make it a more honest life.  I will tell the truth about what I’m feeling.  I will tell the truth about what I’m eating, about how I’m caring for myself.  I will not craft an image.  Like other writers before me, I long to have you, the reader, know me.  I want to tell you on these pages the thoughts that my voice could never fully express.  But on the happy occasion that I do see one of you face to face…I don’t want you to wonder what happened to that person who wrote all that stuff on the internet about autism and real food and finding meaning in the life you lead.

So this blog will continue to be my venting spot, my recipe book, my dream repository – with a renewed sense of truth running throughout, a thread stringing together the beads of my days and my years.
I’m wearing the inside out.

Blogspot Tags: autism, honesty, integrity, living a full life