For Sissie

My sweet, loving, laughing aunt Joyce (“Sissie” to me and to many) died quite unexpectedly last night after a brief illness.  I was there, in the room, with a host of family members.  It was a heartrending yet precious thing to be there as Sissie quietly left this life.

I will miss her every day.

Even though I didn’t get to see her as often as I’d have liked, I did talk to her frequently, just to say hi.  She was always my consultant when I had a sticky cooking issue or question.  I’d call her up, tell her what was going on, and she always knew what to do, how to fix it.

She has been a constant fixture throughout my life.  She worked at the same university my mom did, so childhood summer days spent “working” with my mom always involved a trek across campus to visit Sissie.  I always felt so independent on those walks, and so comfortable visiting her office.  Sissie worked in the housing office of the university – she was famous amongst a certain group of “problem children” who were never happy with their dorm room assignments.  She ruled with an iron fist, and rightly so!  When David and I first began dating, he went with me to a cousin’s wedding.  It was his first time to meet many of my extended family.  He saw Sissie from a distance, stopped short and said…”Wait…she is your AUNT????”  Turns out he had met Sissie already, albeit in a very different context.  That always made Sissie smile when she would remember it in later years.  She knew David on sight, and immediately remembered who he had roomed with, in what dorm, and what trouble he and his roommates were. 

Above all, Sissie loved her family.  Her son, her daughter, her grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, her brothers and sisters, and all of us nieces and nephews. She loved unpretentiously and fully.  She adored my sons, always remembered their birthdays…Kerry and Stephen’s school pictures had a place of honor on her shelf, right alongside the photos of her grandkids and great-grandkids. 

She was generous with her resources in every possibly way. 

Sissie was the quintessential wonderful Southern cook.  Her turkey and dressing would’ve won any contest, and she made pans of it every Thanksgiving to share with anyone who just couldn’t get the knack she had of making that delicious dish (ahem).  Another specialty of hers was tiny, bite-sized lemon tarts – creamy filling inside homemade pastry tarts.  These always showed up at Christmas, and I have very fond memories of the HUNDREDS of tarts Sissie made for my wedding reception years ago.  I can picture her now in her kitchen: barefoot, hair a bit disheveled from the steaming pots on the stove, singing to herself…

Women across the centuries have been the lifeblood of the home, the caretaker, the nurse, the comforter, the provider of meals.  Today, and every day that I endeavor to become a more loving mother, daughter, cousin…every day that I look for the fun in life, that I try to laugh a little more…with every meal that I put together in my kitchen…I honor a most precious Southern lady who succeeded in these ways and countless others..

Mama and Dooley and all of your family miss you.  I love you always, Sis.